25. The entire Season 4 Chrismukkah episode.
Season: 4 (The Chrismukk-huh?)
This was the episode in which Taylor and Ryan fall off a ladder and wake up in an alternate universe. When Ryan sees how different life would be without him, he realizes Marissa would have died in Tijuana if not for him. Sure, the episode helps him let go of Marissa’s tragic death, but she never should have died in the first place. She wasn’t even that great a character but it was nonetheless the show’s demise.
*It would also be hard to rank moments from this episode since the events technically aren’t real.
24. The first time Marissa meets Oliver.
Season: 1 (The Best Chrismukkah Ever)
Coop is forced into therapy for her severe lapse in judgment (overdosing on painkillers, escaping from the hospital, shoplifting from the mall, etc.) and runs into Oliver Trask at the office. This is by far one of the worst moments because it’s the beginning of Oliver, a terrible character who RUINED EVERYTHING. He is the reason Marissa and Ryan broke up later in the season and I am still bitter about it.
23. When Caleb admitted to his “error in judgement” with Renee Wheeler, revealing he is Lindsay’s biological father.
Season: 2 (The Chrismukkah That Almost Wasn’t)
Oh man, this poor girl. Her mom lied to her about her father’s identity her entire life and then she finds out her dad is actually her boyfriend’s grandpa (sort of). And in a crowded living room filled with people, no less. Caleb Nichol stands for everything she disagrees with and their relationship going forward continues down a rocky path. Sorry, Lindsay. I feel for you.
22. When Johnny Harper tried to rob the convenience store.
Season: 3 (The Chrismukkah Bar Mitz-vahkkah)
Johnny was the surfer boy at Newport Union, whom Marissa met after she shot Trey and was expelled from Harbor. Johnny injured his knee in a car accident and we learned in this episode that he couldn’t afford his surgery. Refusing to be a “charity case,” Johnny attempts to pull a gun on a cashier at a convenience store and steal cash. It’s lucky Ryan stopped him because there’s no way in hell he would’ve gotten away with it.
21. That time Marissa opened a bottle of vodka in the car.
Jesus, Marissa, can we stop hopping on the hot mess express? You just crashed your car, Ryan is on probation, and you think it’s a good idea to open a bottle of vodka while he’s driving? UGH GURL, WE NEED TO HAVE WORDS.
20. Jimmy and Julie’s rekindled romance.
OK, I admit, I sort of rooted for this, but Julie had to have known this was a bad idea. Jimmy’s a nice guy but he’s unstable and unreliable. Not to mention, Julie was MARRIED. The best part was after Caleb revealed he had an affair with Lindsay’s mom, Julie accused him of committing adultery. LOL and then the ex-Newpsie goes and hooks up with Jimmy on his boat. Hypocrisy at its finest.
19. When Kirsten totally lost her shit.
Lindsay wasn’t the only one traumatized by Caleb’s revelations. Kirsten, the usually calm and poised mother of two, lashed out at her dad for cheating on her mother. Kiki going crazy with rage was hard to watch.
18. Marissa’s five-finger discount incident at the mall.
The holidays are stressful and all, but COME ON, MARISSA. Coop just overdosed in TJ and she’s in enough trouble as it is, and then she decides to steal from a mall during holiday season, the time of year they double up on security staff. SMH.
17. The beginning of a Julie/Kiki BFF relationship.
Yes, they were already friends, but they definitely get closer this season. Julie hadn’t been down the lower class road in a long time and her Newpsie friends were less than understanding of her financial situation. Kirsten remained Julie’s only true friend and her loyalty was evident when she offered to go into business with Julie to help her get back on her feet.
16. The beginning of Julie Cooper-Nichol and Neil Roberts.
As soon as Julie and Neil hung out for drinks, you knew the writers were developing a love story between the two. They ended up getting engaged in a future episode, but they never married due to Julie’s inability to cope with Marissa’s death.
15. Seth’s really depressing Bar Mitzvah video.
Aw, poor Sethala! Everyone ditched his big celebration for Luke Ward’s party and young Seth in the video is so sad. At least he got the girl eventually, right?
14. Summer’s touching moment with her dad.
This was when the two talked about Summer’s “worst day of her life,” which was the day her mom left them. Neil said Summer spent three days crying in her room, which is why she missed Seth’s Bar Mitzvah. It was a really sad moment, but nice to see depth to their father-daughter bond.
13. The battle to be Seth’s girlfriend.
Our lovable comic book geek finally got some ladies fighting for his attention and it was just the best thing seeing Seth try and be in a relationship with Anna and Summer at the same time. He even tried to give them the same gifts (bad move, Cohen), but they both claimed they didn’t want to be his friend.
12. When Kirsten gave Sandy the evidence he needed to take down Caleb.
Caleb tried to settle with Sandy for like, $250,000 or something, but Kirsten found evidence that the Balboa Heights property was actually worthless. She risked her job and her relationship with her dad to side with Sandy, but it all worked out in the end. Caleb thought Kirsten was ruthless and liked her bold move.
11. The really cute mall montage with Marissa and Ryan.
This was BEFORE Marissa got caught stealing and their fun day at the mall is just so lovely and adorable. Everything could have been OK between these two if it weren’t for her sticky fingers.
10. When Ryan convinced Kirsten to come out of hiding.
Kirsten was understandably upset by the whole “illegitimate child” thing and she locked herself in the closet for several hours, refusing to open the door to anyone except Ryan.
Ryan: I was hoping we could talk about Lindsay.
Kirsten: Is she OK?
Ryan: No, not right now, but I guess it depends.
Kirsten: Depends on what?
Ryan: On whether or not she figures out she’s part of a family that’s pretty good at letting in new members.
Kirsten: (Opens door) Good line.
9. Anna’s Chrismukkah gift to Seth.
I have always been Team Summer, but this was pretty cute. Anna knew exactly what Seth would appreciate because they’re basically the same person, and her comic book was super thoughtful. Good DIYing, Anna.
8. When Summer kissed Cohen under the mistletoe.
They weren’t dating anymore and it was only on the cheek, but it gave you hope for another shot at their relationship. Zach was a nice guy and all, but Summer + Seth 4eva. Luckily our teen hearts were blessed with the Spider-man kiss later in the season.
7. When Sandy paid Caleb $1 for Balboa Heights.
Yaaaassss Sandy yaaaaassss. Caleb was so pissed off and it was awesome. Down with the manipulative rich man!
6. When Seth first introduced us to the most wonderful holiday of all time.
I mean, this moment was very important. We are forever grateful to be blessed with this delightful holiday. According to Seth, it combines the best of Judaism and Christianity and offers eight days of presents, followed by one day of many presents.
5. Everyone dancing to “That’s What Friends Are For” at Ryan’s Chrismukkah Bar Mitz-vahkkah.
A rare moment when everyone was getting along! Seth also finally got to dance with all his friends at a Bar Mitzvah during the song “That’s What Friends Are For,” resulting in a happy ending to the episode.
4. When the Cohens + Marissa + Summer decorated Lindsay’s house for Chrismukkah.
Lindsay never celebrated the holidays because she was always so preoccupied with daddy issues, and her drama with Caleb made the holiday even worse. Summer saved Chrismukkah by giving Lindsay a house full of Christmas cheer and Kirsten initiated the sister bond. So cute!
3. The YAMACLAUS.
A combination of a santa hat and a yamaka. The most perfect invention ever created. YAMACLAUSES FOR EVERYONE.
2. When Ryan hung up his stocking.
It’s a tiny gesture with great significance; he is officially part of the Cohen family. YAY!
1. Summer’s Wonder Woman outfit.
Just LOOK at Cohen’s face. It is so priceless. This is hands down one of the most memorable moments of the entire series and Summer looks damn good. You do you, girl. R-E-S-P-E-C-T.